I could hurt this bad!

I am hurt :*( … And for the first time in my life, I hate myself! For being hurt, for hurting someone… You reminded me of that inevitable fact that I can get hurt and I can hurt people… I was living in this sugar dream that I cant be down ever! But now I am awake!

But this is not what I wanted… between us… And I tried to make things better, you can’t deny that. Sorry for not being up to the mark though… AAAAAAAA!! I dont even know what you are feeling, I don’t know if this even bothers you because I surely can’t go on like this… I just know you think I ditched you, and surprisingly that doesn’t surprise you! Have I done it before? I am sorry for not realizing it, I am sorry that I suck. Trust me- I know you don’t want to, but please try, just this time- I tried my best to care for you, to make a better friend… I guess it wasn’t good enough =( I would just say that I didn’t want to ruin it even more by being near you at that point… I didn’t want to be a burden, the reason for your pain!

I hope we can get this out of our way soon… I am not going to wait for you to take the first step, because I can’t afford to lose your friendship. I admit I am tired of pushing, its been pretty much one-way, but I will hang on, because I am not a quitter. And just like you, I DO NOT ditch! Trust me or not! I will make it alright!

Thanks Yi Rhu, for encouraging me! Ah, it feels great to be encouraged, to be on the receiving end of the warm gestures and words… Thanks for always being there, at my side (even though you’re far away)… I promise I will make it alright and be like you- always there for my friends! At least I will try my best, hope it’s enough…

Hope you are alright. I was always there for you, all you needed to was call. Take Care friend.